You are currently browsing the monthly archive for May 2012.

Yep,,, I’m still stimming away… went to the dr yesterday to have another scan and blood work. Everything is progressing. The lead follicle is at 17mm and the others are at 16mm and 14mm. total of 10. There are some small ones at 10mm which they didn’t count. My lining is “beautiful” (the dr’s word not mine 😛 ) but it’s sad to think that I might not transfer this time around since my AF is still here. I think it’s all these hormones and my body is reacting… I tried too google if there are other people with the same experience and through the whole www I could only find a couple. I asked the dr about it too and he says he has probably seen one or two… not many at all. Ahhhh special me…

Other than that I’ve been ok… as ok can be when you are down this road. The last 3 days I’ve been giving myself the shots. I found the jabs to be less painful and cause less bruise when I give them to myself.  I must say DH is glad that I’ve retired him from jab duty.

My next appointment is Friday. Dr says the ER will be Monday. He’s trying to push things out a little so that may be my AF will be gone by then. I hope it is too… it’ll be a shame to waste “beautiful” lining 😉

Sending positive energy to the universe and hoping to get some in return…I’m in dire need of some!

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So today was day 10 of stim. I’m progressing slowly but progressing…I have a few follicles at 14mm and the rest are at 11. Total number still at 10. After the scan dr told me to come in on Wednesday for a scan to see if I’ll be ready for Friday ER but he says that it’s more likely be Monday. I’m ok with it; as long as I’m responding and we have healthy eggs to retrieve. Today they send me home with new drug to add to the mix, it’s called Orgalutran which is supposed to stop me from ovulating early. Starting today I have 3 injections a day… yeay me… not!

I went to see my mom on Sunday. She was really concern about the jabs I have to take… She doesn’t want me to be in pain. I told her that I’m holding up alright, but I can see in her eyes that she’s worried for me. She’s sad that I have to go through all this to have my family. You see, I have 2 other sisters, one elder and another younger by a couple of years and they have 6 children between them. So I guess my reproductive genes didn’t make it to the party when I was made LOL…  To tell you the truth, I’m quite ok with all the jabs…It’s not too bad. Just wish that the end result was a sure thing though.

Wish me luck… I really need it…

Day 8 of stim. I went to the dr feeling very nervous. Not only anxious about the number of follicles that I’ve managed to “grow” but also because AF is still here and today is day 10. This can’t be right?? The wait at the dr office was not long at all. The first thing I said to the dr when I got in the room was “Dr, my period is still here” he was concern. We did the scan and saw that I had 5 follicles on the right and 5 on the left. So that means one more than my last scan. It’s not much but I’ll take what I can get! My uterus lining is on the right track. I asked the dr if the AF would make the lining thinner. He says that my lining is looking good so it may not be a problem; but we will see as we progress. We might need to resort to doing the retrieval this cycle and freezing till my next cycle for the transfer. At this stage, there is nothing I can do. I’ve done all I can… so I’m going with the flow and see where it’ll take us. Hoping for the best.

The dr kept me on the same dose of Puregon for today and tomorrow and added Menopur to boost the follicle growth. The nurse helped me with the jab today and taught prepare the meds. This is a little more hard core than the simple Puregon pen… we have to do some mixing there’s a powder and a solution and the jab is done using normal syringe. Menopur burns when it’s injected so it’s not very fun. Well then again nothing about this IVF journey is fun; but I’ll do anything I physically can to get one step closer to having children of our own.

My next appointment will be on Monday. Will write more when I know more…

Sending a lot of love and positive energy to everyone reading…Have a great weekend!

I got my first ultrasound since starting stim. I’m on day 6 of stim today. AF is still here. It was a long wait at the dr office this morning. Not fun! The visit with the dr was only a short one. He scanned my ovaries and we saw 4 follicles on the left and another 4 on the right. Dr seems to be happy with it. I on the other hand feel like I’m not responding well enough. I’m on 400ui of Puregon, I’ve read people starting with much lower dosage and ending up with way more follicles. But the dr stressed that we need at least 4 good size follicles to proceed and it’s about the quality rather than quantity… I’m up for another scan and blood test on Saturday. For today and tomorrow I’ll be staying on the same dose of Puregon. 

 Grow follis grow…

Day 5 of stim and so far so good. Dear Hubby is getting much better with giving me the Puregon jabs and the last 2 shots didn’t bruise, thank god! The side effects so far, I get headaches and feel bloated but nothing too bad. I do get some sensation on what I think where my ovaries would be, I hope this means that the meds are working and I’m at this very moment is growing healthy, plum and supper perfect eggs. I have a scan at the Dr. office tomorrow and they’ll give me my next batch of meds.

Praying that tomorrow turns out well. Wish me luck!

Today is my Day 3 of Puregon injections. I’m on 400 iu per day in the morning. The injections are done with the pen so it’s pretty simple. My Dear Hubs give me the jabs. I’ll load the pen up ready for him and he does the deed. I’m not so confident doing it to myself just yet. The first jab was didn’t go so well. I woke DH up when the meds was all loaded and ready for him to just give me the injection. He was still pretty groggy so I ended up with a small bruise ouch!!! my first battle scar, but nothing too bad. The next day was better. He woke up early and I made sure that the meds was at about room temperature. I found out the hard way injecting cool Puregon STINGS so bad!!!

 So far so good I guess. I have an appointment for a blood test and scan on Thursday, which is after 5 injections. I hope I’m responding well. The side effects I’m getting at the moment are headache and bloating. It’s not too bad though…

 I guess my IVF journey has finally started. Wish me luck…

I’m starting the cycle on Friday… deep breaths…

I got a call from the Dr office on Monday saying that they got my blood result back for my insulin and it’s still a bit high then the optimum. They asked me to come in the next day. I told them that my appointment is on Thursday and if we could wait till then but thy insisted that I come in yesterday. So appointment was made. I was so sure that it won’t be good news. I took to Dr Google and read that some people had their cycle postpone for 3 months to get the insulin level back on track, so I assumed that that’s what was installed for me. Another 3 months…. What next? I’ve been getting setbacks at each turn. The anemia, the cyst and now this? On the way home, I had some time to “talk” to myself. I put myself in God’s hands. I will take this a day at a time. I trust my faith and I trust my Dr. whatever he think is best, that is what I will do. Got home, watched Desperate housewives and cried my eyes out – not so sure it was from the series as much as all the things that are going on in my head, but whatever it was it helps clear up some suppressed emotions and I felt lighter… I had a chat with Dear Hubs when he got home. He’s not one to google all these stuff, so what he knows is basically what the dr tells him and what I tell him so he’s very positive. All my googling has made me see what can go wrong throughout this journey. Ignorant is bliss as they say… how I wish I was as excited, optimistic and naive as he is.

Got to the clinic at 1pm and there were not many people waiting so we got to see the dr almost right away. He didn’t talk about the insulin result but wanted to do a scan to see if the cyst was still there. We did the scan. The cyst is still there but almost gone so he was happy with that. After the scan we touched on my insulin result and he said he was ok with the reading. Told me to take an extra Metformin tablet in the morning and that’s that on the subject. Then he send me off for a blood test to check my estradiol and progesterone levels and they will call me later to say if I’m ok to start. I was so surprised. I was all ready to hear him say to postpone this cycle and it’s a total opposite. I went down to get my blood drawn, a nice lady got my vain on her first try and no mention at all on how difficult it was to find my vain… usually it takes at least 2 tries sometimes up to 4 but she made it seems so easy… Will make sure she takes my blood from now on out. We went for lunch while we waited for the result. I told my husband it felt a lot like waiting for a big exam result but the difference with this one was I couldn’t do anything to prepare myself for the test. I didn’t hear the phone rang so I had to call them back. The results were good (I didn’t ask for numbers) and I’m good to go. The Dr will see me on Friday for another scan and we will start from there. I hope there are no surprises on Friday.

 I pray that this journey goes smoothly and from here on out everything will be PERFECT. I wish this for all of us sharing this journey. We are the selected few. Whatever our outcome is in the end, we know we tried… and we tried our very best.

 

Wish me luck!

 I went to see the Dr and I got to see my regular doctor. I was pleased for sure just because I feel so much more calm and comfortable with him. I have a nagging feeling that he knows about last visit crying incident though… he seemed so much more comforting and keep asking me how I was… maybe it’s just my imagination LOL

The cyst is still there. It has grown smaller to barely 10mm but it is very much still there. The dr wants me to stay on OCP for another week and come back for a scan. I’m due for AF soon so it means I’ll be starting close to my natural cycle I hope.  Well we are off to see him again on Thursday… hope the dreaded cyst is gone. I did ask the Dr. what happens if it doesn’t disappear? He was sure that it would… it just needs a little time. So if the cyst is gone during my next visit, I will get my blood work done to see if I’m ok to move forward.

Deep breaths… patients is a virtue… I’m sure all this wait will be worthwhile in the end.

Sending a lot of love and positive energy out to the universe. XOXO

 I had an early appointment with the doctor today. Thinking back even before arriving at the Dr’s office I was a little on the edge. I usually keep calm most of the time. I’ve been having some nagging pain on my sides that’s making me think that the cyst is still there and has grown somehow. We arrived pretty early, took the time to read the papers… didn’t seem like there’s too many people in the waiting room. I was called to come in to see the Dr on the other side of the room.

There are 2 doctors in the practice; my doctor; Dr P and a nice lady doctor; Dr H that just joined some months ago. I was surprise that I was called to see her instead of my usual Dr. Questions were running in my head. I came in and the Dr introduces herself. I sat and said hello… then she started with “What can I do for you?” WHAT??? I’ve been coming to this practice for a year and I’m in the midst of starting IVF and you ask me that? I couldn’t speak… didn’t she at least look at my charts? Do I have to explain everything again?  Are we starting all over again… have Dr P given up on me and passed me along? I felt abandon… I told her that I’m supposed to be Dr P’s patient. She acknowledges and told me that she’s with the practice now and that working with Dr P or her would be the same. I brushed my frustrations aside and started to explain to her my case. I told her that I have been on OCP for 16 days now, I had a cyst and the Dr P has asked me to come in today to see if the cyst is now gone. She then did the scan for me… the cyst has shrunk to 16mm from 34mm on my previous scan then she said that since the cyst is still there, we would abandon this cycle and start on my next cycle. I asked if I would be put on anything for the next cycle and she said no… I told her if we waited for my next cycle I might get the cyst again since that has been the “trend” these last few cycles.  Then she suggested we change protocol… come to see her on day 1 of my next cycle she explained a bit but I have forgotten what she said. I don’ t think I was even listening. She wanted to consult Dr P beforehand. She left the room…I feel like my head exploded…I started to cry…I couldn’t believe what was going on… I feel like Dr P has abandoned me and thrust me with a brand new Dr that seems to know nothing about me. We are starting back to square one with all I can think of was I can’t go through with this… I want to quit. The Dr came back in, saw I was upset and told me not to be… she sees people with cysts all the time and still got pregnant. I told her it’s not that…I was feeling like I’m being passed around and was not comfortable with it. I told her has nothing to do with her skills as a Dr. I just don’t appreciate being passed around like this without even being informed. I was caught so off guard. My husband sits there clearly uncomfortable that poor dear; but I’m sure he felt a lot like I did. Dr H assured me that Dr P didn’t abandon me… he was really tied up today so she is picking up his slack.. I wonder why I was one of the people that got sent the other way… I’m suppose to be on the OCP for another 10 days and have an appointment to see the Dr next week. In the mess of it all; I didn’t even ask who I’ll be seeing next week. Now it’s all I can think of. I will call the Dr office today and see if we can sort it out.

The truth is… eventhough what went on today wasnt the end of the world, it felt a little like it. It feels like we are starting on the wrong foot somehow. I know I shouldn’t put too much into this one incident but…